One Down, Twenty-Nine To Go

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Well, the first day of the month that I hate the most is almost over now.  The fact that it was April Fool's Day didn't really cross my mind too much today either.  Usually I'm wary of everything I hear on this day, because of that simple fact, but today I just didn't let it bother me at all.

No prompt today, because I need to be getting to sleep soon...

I felt like today was... productive.  I finally updated my 2019 Reading Challenge page to reflect the most current books I'm in the process of reading, as well as the ones that I've already completed this year.  I'm really hoping this is going to be the year that I don't fail.  Because I don't consider myself a 'readaholic' for nothing! 😊

I'm going to be introducing two new types of entries this time around... on Tuesdays and Fridays.  I'm excited to test this out for tomorrow's entry.  I just hope I can remember to actually set aside some time to get it done.  I almost forgot to do that today, because other things on my mind were distracting me.  There was also an (intro) event that started today in Nexus, plus a community event where one of my characters helped out (really, more like got suckered into helping) a friend with decorations, since I'm a flower hoarder in the game.  [who am I kidding, I'm the same in real life... 😂]

Anyway... I should probably call it a night here and go to bed.  Goodnight, world. 💤

Failed Expectations

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Well... first off, it's been way too long since I last wrote.  The latter part of the year just kinda flew by too quickly for me to even attempt to catch up.  So I guess I will be starting off with a clean slate once more in 2019.  I suppose I should update the title of this blog to "Somewhat Everyday Scribbles," huh?  😅

Over the past month, I started doing something that I always refused to do... I started playing World of Warcraft (WoW).  Haha.  My friend Amanda has been trying to get me to play for like 15 years now... so I feel that if she sees this, she might freak out a bit. 😋 (though she probably won't see it, but she's welcome to prove me wrong!)  I have to admit, it's fun.   And I hate to admit that, but there you have it.  It's very similar to SWTOR, which has been great for me to get to know the interface and mechanics of the game.  The hubby has started playing it with me as well, so it's at least something for the both of us to do together when boredom hits.  Though we still have yet to get any of our characters to level 20, which is when we can start utilizing mounts.  We keep getting to around level 13-15 and then having the urge to make new characters.  Haha.  Hopefully we will hit that milestone one of these days.  I'm still playing Nexus as well, though mostly just for chatting with friends, the occasional event and daily minor questing when it's available.

I suppose I should reflect on 2018, with it being only days away from ending, but part of me doesn't really want to do that, since that would require remembering that my Granny passed away back at the end of August.  It happened entirely too fast, and it was particularly devastating for me, especially since I was planning to go visit her in November when we made our annual trip to Oklahoma.  I still went to visit her, but it was to her grave instead. 😢  I made sure to place her favorite flowers (purple carnations) on her tombstone that she now shares with my Paw-Paw.  I know she is happy to finally be reunited with him though, so that is a small comfort.  I miss them both so much.

Anyway, I will end this post with that.  Don't expect another post this year though.  I will attempt to start fresh in 2019!  Happy New Year!

Checking In

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So... I know it's been awhile now since my last update.  As the year has flown by, I've gotten less and less motivated to write every day.  Plus, over the past couple months, I've become more and more involved in Nexus, which takes up a lot of whatever free time I have, especially since I have decided to attempt to dabble more into the RP aspect with one of my characters.  I'd forgotten exactly how much time it sucks up.  I'll try to update more often though, without making that sound like a broken record! -sheepish grin-

Anyway... today is my cousin Kara's birthday! 🎈🎂😊  Happy birthday to her!  She just gave birth to her first child (an adorable little girl) a few months ago, so I'm sure she's more focused on her, rather than the fact that it's her birthday.  But whatever she's doing, I hope she's having a blast.

Our plans for the rest of the day include meeting up with my brother-in-law, his wife and a couple of his grandkids to see Ant-Man & the Wasp later this afternoon!  I love what Paul Rudd brings to the character, and I'm excited to see what this sequel brings to the Marvel world, especially after the intense events of Infinity War a few months ago.  I haven't researched if the timeline is supposed to follow that or not, but I suppose that will be explained, possibly.

Begin Again

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So I'm just going to write May off as a failure, at this point.  Haha.  It was way too busy with my mom here for the main majority of the month, so we're just not going to speak of it, and start fresh for June. 😉

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So I finally opened up Photoshop and made a brand new banner last week ⇒

It's slightly out of my usual style, but I think I like it.  I wanted a version of this banner featuring Jessica Jones, that looks better on lighter backgrounds, instead of the one I made originally, which really only looks good on dark backgrounds.  I had another idea in mind for this, but I like how it turned out... I think.  Haha.  This one is also based on the second season of Jessica Jones, in regards to the image and the sub-text I used.

In other news, sorry for the severe lack of posting.  I have been really busy with work and gaming lately, as I decided to jump back into Nexus, and get my oldest character to the next tier of leveling.  It's difficult because I have to have a certain amount of wins from events within the game (referred to as the "Skill trial") and the timing of said events isn't always on my side.  But I'm attempting to catch every single one that I can.

We've been having some issues with our home security system acting up over the past month, and after several phone calls into customer service, as well as three technician visits, I think it is finally working again.  We'll see though.  Time will tell if the sensors keep working as they should, or if they start being screwy again.  The whole thing has been annoying, to say the least.  But if the problem isn't fixed this time, we're going to be getting a new system, and demanding that our cable company let us out of the contract for using their system, without consequences.

I Don't Have a Title Handy...

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First off, how is it already May?!?  😶  Maybe this will be the month where I finally keep up with posting EVERY DAY. 😜

So.  I realize that I've missed quite a few days lately.  I just haven't been feeling particularly very chatty.  I've also been busy in Nexus, getting more involved in one of the clans I'm in, amidst trying desperately to find people to gain some experience with, so that I can finally advance my highest rogue to the next level.  I recently upgraded some of my armor as well, with newer items that have been released since I last played... and at an incredibly high expense, but I'm hoping it's worth the extra damage that I'll do.  I just need to find people to help me test it out!  But it's highly frustrating and I'm finding that you have to have friends within the game to really get steady experience, at least as a rogue, especially with how warriors completely dwarf the rogue.  And most of the friends that I knew back in the old days when I played more, have since moved on.  Except for one, which has been great whenever he's online and able to hunt, but our schedules just don't collide that often.  So I've now just given up trying to hunt as much with a group and mainly just solo when I can.  It's incredibly slow, and I have to be in the right mood to do it, but I guess it's better than nothing!

However, I've forgotten how addicting the game can be as well.  Sometimes I wish I could be on there all the time, and not have the hubby get mad at me for ignoring him, haha.  The last time I really actively played, I was living alone in my own apartment, going to college and working part-time.  I wasn't single, BUT the guy I was dating also played the game, so it didn't feel like I was ignoring him when I spent most of my free time there.

Anyway... this is probably a pretty boring post for anyone who reads this, as I'm sure you don't play the game, so I'll just shut up now.  Haha.  I'm getting excited for my mom's visit in 8 days!!!  Not so excited for the massive cleaning that I still have to get done though, in the meantime... 😒😫

Unforeseen

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✍ Contest Entry for NexusTK ✍

Prompt: When the goats took over...

(Keep in mind this was written in a roleplay format, relating to the game, so if there are some things that you don't fully understand, such as places, just go with it.)

The deafening sound infiltrated my ears as I lounged in the sheep fields in the middle of the Wilderness, my hair whipping behind my head as I lifted myself up to investigate this unsettling new development.  My faithful companion, Stormi, who is a bobcat, immediately pricked her ears up to listen more closely, her head rising from its resting spot on my leg, those gray eyes staring intently at the dark figures rapidly approaching in the distance.  The sound was growing louder with every passing moment.  Squinting in the brightness of the sun’s rays, I jumped to my feet, leaning closer, as if that would instantly reveal the source. 

The surrounding sheep, who had been peacefully sleeping or eating, much of what their daily lives consisted of, turned to gaze in the direction of that unpleasant sound. I felt the ground start to quake slightly, under the pressure of this imminent wall of darkness; the grass causing a tickling sensation where its tendrils had coiled around the toes of my bare feet. Before the smile could reach my face, I shook my feet free and slipped into my simple blue flats.

When the herd finally reached the edge of the fields, I could see them more clearly for what they were… mountain goats. As a whole, they were a chaos of colors: whites, grays, browns and blacks with backward curving horns of varying sizes, yet kind faces that seemed to depict pure innocence. Though I knew from firsthand experience that looks can be deceiving, and I steeled myself for a fight, keeping my strongest protection spell close at hand. There were hundreds of them, and though I was small for my age, I had plenty of courage to face whatever this was.

Grasping Inspiration Within a Game

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So I was looking through photos last night, planning out posts for my photoblog, and I realized that before this latest trip to Lake Tahoe last month, we hadn't taken a 'photography road trip' since April 2017 (excluding our drive to OKC at the end of November, that is).  Which sucks for a person like me, who loves taking photos of anything and everything... I really need to fix that.  Although I suppose I will next month, since my mom is going to be coming out here to visit for the majority of the month, and she's expecting to have at least one or two road-tripping 'adventures' while she's here.

In other news, I think I'm going to try competing in the weekly story or poetry contest in my game, Nexus.  If I win first or second place, or 2 honorable mentions, it'll fulfill what they call the "culture" trial in a quest to reach another major level.  And also, I just feel like writing, but I need some inspiration.  So I have the choice of writing a story from the prompt "When the goats took over..." (which makes me laugh 😄) or a poem about "Making mistakes."  Or both, maybe!  

So that's what I'll be working on for the rest of the day, until something else that I need to do comes up. 😊

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✍ What I've got so far ✍

The deafening sound infiltrated my ears as I lounged in the sheep fields in the middle of the wilderness, my hair whipping behind my head as I lifted myself up to investigate this unsettling new development.  My faithful companion, Stormi, who is a bobcat, immediately pricked her ears up to listen more closely, her head rising from its resting spot on my leg, those gray eyes staring intently at the dark figures rapidly approaching in the distance.  The sound was growing louder with every passing moment.  Squinting in the brightness of the sun’s rays, I jumped to my feet, leaning closer, as if that would instantly reveal the source.

The surrounding sheep, who had been peacefully sleeping or eating, much of what their daily lives consisted of, turned to gaze in the direction of that unpleasant sound.  I felt the ground start to quake slightly, under the pressure of this imminent wall of darkness; the grass causing a tickling sensation where its tendrils had coiled around the toes of my bare feet. 

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Not sure where I'm going with this just yet, but hopefully I'll figure it out before the 14th when it's due!

-screams in frustration-

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I hate when I can't fully express my intensely annoyed state of mind because of the fact that others may read it and get offended.  Though who am I kidding, it's not like anyone really reads this blog, other than a couple loyal friends (you know who you guys are 💜) but still, in the off chance that they do...  ugh.  This is why I used to prefer Twitter over Facebook, but now I can't even use that the same way anymore.

Though I suppose it's my own fault, for thinking that someone would actually take some time off work (who has been saying that he has plenty of time to spare and needs to plan it out) when my mom is going to be out here next month, just to spend time with her, because she considers both of us her "kids," no matter how much he may think that she doesn't like him.  Hell, he wouldn't even take time off to go with me to the Urgent Care clinic when he knew I was totally freaked out about my neck issues and needed someone with me, why would I even expect him to take more time off work for my mom?  And it's not like I don't put up with enough crap from his family, ALL THE TIME.  Ugh.

I just can't seem to do anything right, I guess.  I make a statement, even in a joking manner, not remotely angry, and I get accused of trying to start a fight?!  How does that even happen?  So instead of continuing "the fight" by saying anything else, I'm probably going to be spending my Friday night sitting here alone on the couch, or in the office playing NexusTK or SWTOR.  Which is fine by me because I'm actually on a mission in Nexus to obtain two items, which involves hours of crafting via digging in the dirt (a.k.a. mining), because the drop is pretty random.

The underlying point of this post is... I just really miss my mom. 😢

So I Used to Write Poetry...

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Today I'm going to share something a little out of the ordinary... there was a time when I used to write poetry, mainly back when I was a teenager, and the topics revolved mainly around relationships.  Writing has always been my way of coping with feelings and emotions that I couldn't otherwise express out loud.  So that's why most of my early poems include heartbreak and may have more of a sad vibe.

Anyway, the other day I discovered a lost poem that I'd written, probably in 2007 or 2008, for a poetry contest within NexusTK's weekly challenge.  This was part of a requirement needed to advance to the next level also, but I don't think I won with this poem.  I'm going to share it here because upon reading it again, I really thought I did a nice job with this. 😊  I don't feel like I could still write the same way nowadays, but... never say never, right?  Anyway, here it is:

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Untitled

I've never been an open book ~
The real me hidden deep beyond that first look
Complex yet simple, sealed shut tight
Cloaked in darkness, shielded from the light.

I was sure I'd never find
Someone to know my heart, soul and mind.
That special one determined enough to break through
The existence of a person I never knew.

    Until one sweet summer day
    When the spirits of love came out to play.

He took me by surprise,
Igniting an emotion I felt had reached its demise.
He dug at the seams of this closed book
Itching and scratching to get past that first look.

He gave me a reason to brighten my world
And the courage to let him see my feelings unfold.
With my soul set free, gone was the need to hide
Because of that wonderful feeling deep down inside.

Finding a Fix [Hopefully]

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So, let's start with the good about today.  I went ahead and registered for another month on Nexus.  Mainly because I realized that I could get my 11th year 'wisdom gown,' which is a sort of incentive for playing the game and sticking around.  You get a different exclusive outfit for every year that you've had an account.  So since I created my character back in March of 2007, I was able to claim my 11th year gown.  And while I didn't like it at first, I made it work, via finding the perfect color palette, or dye.  I actually like to make a cumulative graphic with every dye available in the game, which I call my dye charts.  They help for knowing what an outfit will look like, before spending money on the dye at a future date.  So, after spending a good chunk of my morning on a big event quest, I took quite a few screenshots of this new gown in some of the different dyes.  And that's the 2D version of me that you see in the top left [Apey].  Well, not exactly, but pretty close!  I only wish I had that badass dragon staff to carry around with me. 😜

And now on to the crappy, near-anxiety-attack-filled portion of my day.  After dealing with this neck pain off and on for the past 3 weeks, I finally went in to the urgent care clinic today, to see if I could get it checked out, since I do not have a primary doctor picked out.  After waiting about an hour after checking in, I finally got called back to a room, only for the nurse practitioner to appear a bit confused at my symptoms... although she did say that I would probably need a higher level of care, then she ordered a bunch of x-rays of my neck.  So I was led to the room where they do that, completely nervous and scared because I've never had anything like that done before... but thankfully, the guy that took the pictures was really nice and understanding of me being such a baby about it all.

I will say, waiting for the results was just about the hardest 25 minutes that I've had to face in a very long time.  Especially waiting by myself... going over all of the worst-case scenarios and trying to prevent myself from just breaking down crying right there in that empty room that seemed like it was closing in on me, minute by minute.  Ugh.  I hated it.  In the end, it turned out that my bones were fine, nothing was wrong, but there was a small something in the muscle area, which led her to prescribe a muscle-relaxant medication, as well as ibuprofen.  So hopefully this will fix my problem, because otherwise, I will have to go in for an MRI and I don't know how I'd handle that monster....

New Month, New Book

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So I started out my day with the new selection from B&N Readouts, which I've updated on my 2018 Reading Challenge page.  It's a book about Sherlock Holmes and an adventure that takes him (and Dr. Watson) to Paris to investigate a possible kidnapping of a cabaret singer's son.  I actually have never read any of the Sherlock Holmes stories before (though I do have some in the library of my Nook account), and the extent of what I know about Mr. Holmes is from the movies starring Robert Downey Jr. & Jude Law, which I LOVED!  The banter they share and chemistry the two of them displayed was great to watch.  However, this book starts out pretty dark, with Holmes reverting back to the use of cocaine after a difficult case and a stint in jail ("gaol" as it is referenced in the story, via the 1880s setting), after he was accused of tampering with evidence.  Anyway, I'm giving the story a chance, despite the low reviews it has received on Goodreads.  I never let critics influence my interest in things, as they don't know me personally and can't possibly know what I would like.

Welcome!

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First off, hello to anyone who happens to stumble upon my new blog. 😊

I was inspired (coughPRESSUREDcough 😜) to start this via my longtime forum friend, Amanda, who suggested that I take this challenge with her, of writing a post every day for the year of 2018.  (And maybe later years as well, we'll see how this goes first!)  I was initially hesitant, simply because I don't think my life is interesting enough to write about that much.  Haha.